This world is so incredibly fucked. At the risk of sounding like a new age yoga mom or an inspirational meme making millennial, I would like to propose that we need more love. Not more proselytizing on social media. Not more telling people how to grieve. Not more government committees. Not more protests. Not more tweet-ups. We need fucking love.  So much love that that we walk around hugging strangers. So much love that cartoon hearts shoot from our buttholes. So much love that it changes the very structure of our DNA to look like little fucking rainbows. So much love that violent, hateful people kill themselves out of pure disgust.

To kick of this love fest, here is a list of things I love: 

1) Motherfucking vegetables – There is no god, but veggies are pretty fucking close. 

2) My little baby Ezra and my wife Crystal

Look at these fucks!

  C’mon! Look at these beautiful fuckers!

 

3) Scaryass tattoos

Ooooooooh scary!

                       Ooooooooh scary!

 

4) Fucking trees

Hahahaha, they're making love

      Hahahaha, they’re making love

 

5) Running impossibly long distances

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   Check out my O face after the AR50

6) Punk rock – I’m 12 years old! Pillage the village! Wooooooo! 

7) Your weird artKeep making that shit, you strange fucks!

8) Radical language – Only complete shitbags don’t read poems

9) My students (even the dickhead ones) – I can’t put up any pictures here because I’ll probably get in trouble. However, just imagine a dickheaded student. I love them the best. 

10) Smoothies – Hella vitamins

11) Watching badass shit on TV

Hold the door, hold the door, hol door ho dor hodor HODOR!!!

Hold the door, hold the door, hol door ho dor hodor HODOR!!!

12) The sun – shiny as fuck

13) Ignorant rap music

Bickin back bein bool

               Bickin back bein bool

14) Joe Rogan – bro scholar

15) Satanic black metal

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“Hey, what should we put on our next album cover?” “Ummm, how bout evil Jesus eating his finger?”

16) My mommy

Thank you for these beautiful soap opera Mexican genes

Thank you, based mother, for these beautiful soap opera Mexican genes

17) Pamplemousse La Croix

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18) Being gay with Garth Greenwell

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19) This gnarly tweeker cutting down our dead tree

Can you see him?

Can you see him? It’s the Sacramento version of Where’s Waldo?

Comments

  1. Jeff Musser says:

    xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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