Google execs issued a statement saying they have nothing to do with the disturbing suggestions when you type a query into the search engine. Try it. When you start to type something into a Google search, you’ll find some fucked up, perverted or racist answer. The reason that happens is not because only the people at Google are fucked up, perverted and racist, it’s because all people are fucked up, perverted and racist.

And, of course, whenever stuff happens, people become OUTRAGED! Why? Because when people aren’t making fun of retards, looking at porn and calling people wetback, being outraged at other people makes them feel better about themselves.

Which just demonstrates how fragile and ridiculous we are. People are idiots and then there is outcry because, well, people are idiots. Obviously Google doesn’t suggest that US first lady Michelle Obama is a monkey. It’s just computer algorithms, man.

Here are some other inexplicably funny Google search results:

“Mexican people stole my car”

“White people smell like wet dogs”

“Hannah montana is a hootchie mama”

“Afghanistan is the where empires go to die”

“I am extremely terrified of Chinese people”


  1. Jake Catlett says:

    hmmm… well, just to test your theory, I simply typed the word “why” into google. not all the suggestions were funny, but here’s the good un’s: (the first one was really the FIRST ONE!)

    why do men have nipples
    why is my poop green
    why do dogs eat poop
    why is there a dead pakistani on my couch
    why did I get married
    why did michael jackson turn white

    6 out of 10 suggestions had humor value. that’s pretty good. two of them mentioned race, two of them shit, one about domestic regrets, and the other about man tits.

    so, I think your point has been proven.

  2. “Why is there a dead Pakistani on my couch”

    Duh, who needs to Google the answer to that?

  3. Jake Catlett says:

    apparently lots of folks, otherwise Google wouldn’t have found it so germane. why is my poop green, now that’s one I can wrap my head around.

  4. Autumn Sky says:

    “Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch?” is one of the most famous lines from Lost, actually. :)

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