What rhymes with suck?

Hey kid, remember the days when mustaches, Members Only jackets and tight pants were the uniform of hip-hop, not just costumes for suburban kids to dress ironically? Of course not. What are you, like, 15? Anyway, it was a good time. I know you think guys like Ja Rule are

Sexual Offender of the day!

Meet Justin Swanson. He’s a rapist who was living in the midtown area (19th & L) and has been in violation of his registration requirements since 2005. So that means this guy, his mustache and mullet have been on the loose, partying and raping for the last four

Dr. Laura loves to party

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a conservative talk radio host who is neither a doctor nor a conservative. She might masquerade as a conservative when she says things like: … a huge portion of the male homosexual populace is predatory on young boys. But I have a feeling

How Rude!

Meth head. Oh, no, that's just a fucked up hat. This is turning into a Full House blog. I forgot I wrote this preview when Stephanie Tanner came to Sacramento for her speaking tour. I guess after Full House she moved into Crack House. But she got clean and wanted to

Anger management classes

I just saw this website for online anger management classes: But then I saw this: What kind of villain charges $195  for an online class? It’s highway robbery, you shit eating thief. When I see you I will rip your ass off and make it fart the national anthem.

Happy Sunday, the world is horrible

This story is supremely fucked up. (I wish CNN would use this as their lead every now and then.) Six-year-old Elena Desserich was diagnosed with brain cancer. Her tumor became so enlarged that she lost the ability to speak, so she began to leave little notes around the

Danny Tanner at the Crest

You know what the worst thing on the planet is? Racism. But that’s not what I was going to say. I actually just thought of that and then typed it. But another bad thing is when a comedian comes to town and some shitty news organization does a recap of the comedy

Natomas Buzz vs. Josh Fernandez

Apparently the people at the Natomas Buzz are angry about me taking a swipe at their fine city. It was more like an affectionate pinch on the ass. Here’s the sentence: So I got in my car and drove to Natomas. (Here’s a fun fact: In Spanish, I think the word Natomas
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